Welcome back to abundant sex. Last time we discussed that God, the creator of sex, wants us to experience an abundant, awesome sex life. When you do sexual intimacy the way God designed it to be done, it will be so good that movie stars, rock stars and sports stars be like, “Dang, that couple is having some amazing sex! I’m so jeal-ey!!”
In this post we will discuss how to build romantic love and sexual intimacy on a solid foundation. If you want to build something to last, it’s gotta be built on a foundation that is deep, structurally sound, and will not move or shift over time.
Many of us of seen, in one form or another, a physical foundation – most likely in the walls of our crawl space or basement – or in the piers of a deck, or, well, the piers of a pier 🙂
But what does a non-physical foundation look like? A mental, spiritual, emotional, romantic foundation? What makes that kind of foundation strong and able to withstand the test of time? Thanks for asking. The answer is – principles.
Here are a few examples of principles in action. First from the business world. From the book on entrepreneurship, Zero to One, by Peter Thiel,
The paradox of teaching entrepreneurship is that such a formula necessarily cannot exist; because every innovation is new and unique, no authority can prescribe in concrete terms how to be innovative. Indeed, the single most powerful pattern I have noticed is that successful entrepreneurs find value in unexpected places, and they do this by thinking about business first from principles instead of formulas.
We all want formulas. We want the dummies book for everything. Formulas are passive, take out much of the guess work and make things easier – unfortunately – they kill creativity and unique expression.
Principles on the other hand are active. They require individual engagement and hard work in order to incorporate them to a meaningful extent.
Think of some business principles.
Buy Low and Sell High.
Supply and Demand
How long have those been around? How about Warren Buffett’s foundational investing principle that made him a billionaire:
Rule #1 – Don’t Lose Money.
Another example of something built on a solid foundation of principles – the cell phone. All cell phones are based on the engineering principle of the propagation of electromagnetic waves in free space. This principle was developed hundreds of years ago by super-smart scientists – long before we had the creative expression of technology to actually do anything with it. Fist came radios, then television, then radar, microwaves and finally cell phones. All based on the same foundational principle.
What do these examples tell us about principles?
- Principles are typically old – often very old. They are usually tried, tested, and verified by many people over decades, centuries or even millennia.
- Principles are generally true for all time and are generally true in all contexts. If you see a principle that once was true and no longer is, or is not true in some contexts, then it was probably never a real principle to start with
- Principles require active, ongoing engagement for successful implementation.
Active engagement with principles can be defined as follows:
- Ask
- You need the desire to live by certain principles – you need to ask for them
- Listen
- You need to listen to trusted sources for the principles you are asking for
- Understand
- You need to make sure you have enough understanding of the principle to begin a successful engagement with it
- Apply
- You need to apply the principle in your life – regularly – monthly, weekly, daily, hourly. Application is personal, practical engagement. It takes hard work and frequent practice.
- Feedback
- You need feedback, external feedback from others on how well you are following that principle. You do not know what you don’t know. It helps greatly if those people giving you feedback are recognized as successfully engaging the principle you are asking for feedback on.
If you are not actively engaging principles using the five methods described above, those principles will never become a solid foundation for you.
If you choose to look for formulas instead of principles – the easy way out – things may not go very well for you. Formulas create assembly lines that are boring, tiresome, nothing to look forward to, and to some extent, enslaving.
Principles on the other hand can create amazing diversity. Go back to cell phones. The principle of the propagation of electromagnetic waves has created iPhones, Androids, Samsung Galaxies, Phablets like the Galaxy Note (sorry, I’m an android guy!). That is incredible diversity and exciting implementation that has artistic value in addition to amazing utility.
Think about the principles that result in successful entrepreneurs. The fruit of their labor has created – microfinance, technology start-ups, etc. These have changed our lives – and changed the world. Incredibly diverse, creative and meaningful.
If formulas can enslave us – principles can free us. In other words, principles can help us to unleash the unique masterpiece that we have been created to be in every aspect of our lives – including sexual intimacy and romantic love.
Engaging the principles of deep romantic love and abundant sex with creativity and hard work will result in a unique, romantic masterpiece – a one-of-a kind work of art that will be fulfilling and will inspire others.
What are some of the foundational principles of abundant romantic love / abundant sexual intimacy? Tune in for the next couple blogs!!
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